Homeless Odyssey

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You know those viral videos of homeless people, where they turn out to be a gifted painter/wonderful musician/insert skill here? Have you seen ’em?  They’re really rather awesome and hit you right in the feeliest of feels.

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Watch this bum play the piano!
They passed this hobo a guitar – you will not BELIEVE what happened next!

What if they had no discernible skills whatsoever? What then?

But nah – it takes TALENT for a person to be deemed worthy. A video clip that makes you feel good about yourself, because y’know, THOSE ones – the ones with whom you can identify – are worth saving.

The mean old grumpy arsed stinkin’ man on the street is homeless. But fuck him – he can’t sing.

And as for that pisshead in Waterstones’ doorway? Why won’t she tap-dance for us?

Don’t get me started on that baggy old bag who sleeps under the rhythmless bridge. Can’t play for toffee.

Luckily, we will never have to see them. Nobody’d want to see that footage, so -thank fuck- they can stay invisible.

But rest assured – as not one of those people can hold a tune, so you should feel free to walk on by.